Monday, May 31, 2010

Wondering if Church Attendance IS WORTH IT!

It seems with each passing week I am discouraged more and more after Sunday's service. Yet today took the cake! A lot of you know that me and my daughter moved from VA almost a year ago because I was getting a divorce, and we're now in Idaho. Idaho is neither of our choices but we've made the best of it. The youth group at this church is a far cry from one that I was involved in, or any of my girls. There is a lot of drama, the kids act worse than the non churched kids. The youth pastor has no control over them. On Friday my daughter went to spend the night at one of the girl's home's and a bunch of the other girls were going to be there. My daughter is 13 weeks pregnant, she is 17, and planning on giving the baby up for adoption. She is mature beyond her years. She realizes the mistake she made and is doing what is best for the baby. The girl's home that she went to was sent away to a youth ranch for troubled teens because her parents couldn't handle her, and she was just home for the weekend. This girl said to my daughter over some stupid TV show as channels were being flipped "you should've thought about that the first time" referring to her being pregnant. Kristian was so upset she came home. Today at church I made it a point to speak to this girl's parents about her comment and not only was my daughter accused of something she didn't do, there was no apology or anything. Instead I got told by the father because in talking to him in the foyer as he told me that Kris was acting inappropriate and wanted to watch The History of Sex, and I said that doesn't sound like my daughter, and your going to say something about my kid when you lost your church because you were addicted to drugs, and you had to send your daughter away because you couldn't control her? I don't think you have anything to say to me. He stormed off saying that he forgave me and hoped God would too. And I was like what? I haven't done anything wrong. My daughter was wronged by your daughter, and you can't even make her take responsibility.
Church is suppose to be a safe place, a place where people should feel comfortable to be themselves and not feel like they have to twist and turn themselves into a pretzel to fit into someone's mold.
There was more that happened that I didn't write here. It wasn't my plan to have a knock down drag out fight with this man. In fact I wanted to talk to the young girl's mother, but she refused to talk to me, so he came out into the foyer, after conferring with his daughter to get their story straight. Up until that point he had no idea what was going on.
At this point I don't know that I will be attending Sunday services for awhile. I just don't see a point. There are just too many fake and phony people and I'd rather stay at home. I mean why get up and get ready to go and be around people who could careless? They don't take responsibility for their actions. Everyone else is to blame. The lies they tell, they may as well be Satan himself. I know this sounds harsh, it's just the truth. In the last 18 months I have worked very hard to rid myself of drama, lies, and people that create it, and I surely don't want to be around it on a regular basis. It is just too stressful for me. Today definitely was over the top!

3 comments:

CherryBlossomMJ said...

My prayers are with you and your daughter. Two thoughts, one is to talk to the head Pastor and the second is to find a new church home. Do not give up all together because Satan seems to strong.

Andi said...

Thanks for your thoughts a prayers Margaret. I am so incredibly over this kind of behavior and it seems to be more and more prevelant and I just don't have the energy to continue to deal with this. My focus is on Kris and helping her through her pregnancy and healing with what her father did. That has to be the top priority.

Debbie F said...

I am so sorry you had to go through this. And your poor daughter too. I would definitely find another church or just worship at home. I would not go to a church where the people can't even admit when they make a mistake. I will pray for you and your daughter and i hope things get easier for you both.

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